Smelling bullshit thousands of times better than you

People ask “Why do you want squirrel to go to Heaven? Why not Hell?”  I say “I’m a dog, not an asshole.”

Letter is 5 pages.  Still reading. It is very long. Nothing yet about forcing squirrel into heaven.
Popoff wants to end my debt. I ate cat’s food. Do I owe the cat? I am confused.
Ruh-oh, I need to send money. I do not have money.  I am a dog. I can send stuffy? Stuffy is worth more than $20 to me.

Letter is 5 pages.  Still reading. It is very long. Nothing yet about forcing squirrel into heaven.

Popoff wants to end my debt. I ate cat’s food. Do I owe the cat? I am confused.

Ruh-oh, I need to send money. I do not have money.  I am a dog. I can send stuffy? Stuffy is worth more than $20 to me.

It came! Salvation is here? Envelope is heavy. Postage was $1.49. Popoff is good man.

It came! Salvation is here? Envelope is heavy. Postage was $1.49. Popoff is good man.

Popoff is good. This man had demons in his gold fillings.  Popoff shook them out in 5 minutes.

Popoff is good. This man had demons in his gold fillings.  Popoff shook them out in 5 minutes.

I needed help.  I saw Peter Popoff’s website.  God speaks to Popoff.  I asked Popoff to smite squirrel.

I needed help.  I saw Peter Popoff’s website.  God speaks to Popoff.  I asked Popoff to smite squirrel.

My name is Maeve.  I am a skeptic dog.  Red squirrel is my nemesis.  Squirrel invaded my garage.  Squirrel ate garage apples.  I tried to eat squirrel; squirrel was too fast.  I tried to eat squirrel again; squirrel pooped on my doorstep.  I don’t like squirrel

My name is Maeve.  I am a skeptic dog.  Red squirrel is my nemesis.  Squirrel invaded my garage.  Squirrel ate garage apples.  I tried to eat squirrel; squirrel was too fast.  I tried to eat squirrel again; squirrel pooped on my doorstep.  I don’t like squirrel